a story for Kwona

Kwona is doing something for enrichment night and asked my mom and I to share stories of crazy days when things 'never stopped'. This one came to mind:

The morning of my good friend Jackie’s wedding I was finishing up some work before making the 4 hour drive to Salt Lake City to be there for her reception. I had to drop off something to my boss before I left. I was stopped at a stop sign just down the street from her home when I noticed a cat lying in the ditch with a Campbell’s soup can stuck on her head. I jumped out and tried to pull the can off, but it wouldn’t budge. The cat was panting and crying, making me feel awful. I scooped her up, and with soup dripping down my arms onto the seat and floor of my truck, I drove the rest of the way to her house with the half dead cat on my lap.

I grabbed a can opener and got the bottom off the can so the cat could breathe while I lathered her up with olive oil to hopefully slip the can off her head. I'll never forget how pathetic she looked in there with her face squished up covered with soup. She was meowing and not at all happy with any of this. This is when we noticed that she was very very pregnant! She was having quite the day, too!!

The cat was soon on her way sans can and I was on my way sans cat. {but just barely - you know I wanted to keep her!} About 40 minutes out of town the engine revved up and then shut off completely. I coasted into a truck stop and did what anyone would do - popped the hood and looked around at what was in there like I had any idea what I was looking for while I thought of a plan. A couple men approached and asked if I needed help. I told them my predicament and they immediately offered me a ride. I was taking them in all the while, making sure I even wanted to get in a car with them. I didn’t have time to think too hard about it, and they seemed harmless. I grabbed my bags from my truck along with a giant potted plant for my mom and followed them to their tiny car. The car was made tinier still by the fact that they were on their way to Wyoming with a bunch of their dead mother’s belonging they had picked up from her home in Las Vegas. They quickly rearranged a few things and I inserted myself into the backseat, with my bags and plant on my lap. I wasn't alone back there either among the boxes. I was wedged in with a gigantic German Shepherd named Hans. Incidentally the dog was suffering from some serious indigestion. The men apologized for Hans, our happy, oblivious companion, who smiled at me while letting loose the most terrible smells from his big hot hairy body leaning up next to me, licking my arm.
We were a half hour away from the next city and I was frantically calling through the numbers in my phone book looking for a car to rent. My new friends had offered to drive me the rest of the way, almost insisting on it. But I refused. I couldn’t stand Hans that long, and they were making their way through a case of Nevada beer. Either I was going to pass out from asphyxiation, or we were going to run off the road.

They dropped me at the airport in Cedar City where I lucked out renting a beautiful dark gray Honda Accord. I made great time from there and made it just in time for Jackie’s reception. She was puzzled at my tears when we hugged. I think the emotion of the day had caught up to me finally. I brushed it off as happy tears for her, only telling her the story years later.

Side note: I had my truck towed to work {a temp job in between my other 2 jobs for a friend while she had her baby} where it sat until I got home. I was cleaning out all my personal belongings before I sold it for scrap. {The transmission was out and it would have cost too much to fix.} I somehow released the parking break before going inside. It wasn’t too much later when I heard a big crash and ran outside to find the truck at the bottom of a small hill buried in tractor parts and pushed under a chain link fence. I don't remember what happened next, or how I got it out of that mess, but I do remember the immense relief I felt when I parted ways with it shortly after for a serious upgrade: the Honda I still love every day now. Besides, the poor truck smelled like soup!